Sunday, 18 June 2017

How to read suits in tarot: wands

Long time no see! I've been bogged down by other things in life, but now at the verge of a holiday, I found new inspiration to delve in to tarot again. I figured something the other day about how to understand and interpret suits, and I thought I could share it with others. This way of thinking made it easier for me, I hope it helps others. It's based on referring back to the earlier card and seeing what was built from that. It's by no means my own and original idea, but it somehow clicked just recently.

Suits in tarot deck

As mentioned before, a standard tarot deck of 78 cards is divided into suits, similarly to a standard playing card deck. The suits are called wands, swords, cups and pentacles/coins and they all symbolise a different element: fire, air, water and earth, respectively; or passion/willpower, intelligence/logic, emotions, and material matters.

Suit of wands

Let's start with wands, the suit of willpower, volition (free will, the ability to use one's will), passion and drive. Wands are the suit of fire, normally depicted with wooden clubs, branches or similar, to show material that is burnt, consumed, needed to keep the fire (passion) alive. Everything in tarot is about symbols and often in decks, the wands/branches sprout shoots or buds to symbolise life force, energy and viability.

Ace of Wands - this is the first spark of will, the initial flash of wanting something. It's like a matchstick burning: quick to flare, quick to fade. The want can relate to ambition, pursuit or passion like sex; or it can be the first flame of crush or the feeling that you want to achieve something in life.

Ace of Wands, The Wild Unknown Tarot. The first spark that initiates what's to come.
2 of Wands - this card usually shows two wands, symbolising two choices or pathways. A common interpretation is choice. However, because all 2's in tarot symbolise choice, it can be tricky to try and tell the difference between this and that kind of choice. Why this 2 and not some other 2? 2 Wands adds to the initial spark of the Ace: you cultivate your original idea, need or want; carry it further, and that is the choice - whether to try to pursue this path and goal, or initiate another spark; scratch a new matchstick instead of passing on the fire from the first one? Sometimes, 2 Wands can also mean two wills - two people coming together in passion, or wanting different things.

3 of Wands - many people have hard time telling the difference between 2 Wands and 3 Wands, because in the standard imagery they are quite similar. In 2 Wands, a person stands looking towards the ocean with two wands, and in 3 Wands, a person stands looking towards the ocean with three wands, waiting for three ships to arrive. The difference is that in 3 Wands, the person has started to carry out the plan, has made the choice of 2 Wands; has cultivated the fire/will/passion, kept it alive for long enough to see whether it can bear fruit. The ships in the horizon symbolise this wish to reach a goal. 3 Wands often means "waiting for the future results" or "future results are almost here" in readings.

4 of Wands - what happens after the results come in? It's time to enjoy life! 4 Wands is often interpreted as the marriage card, or engagement, graduation or housewarming card, but celebration is just one aspect of it. All those signposts and celebrations are a culmination of a person/people making a decision in the past, sticking to it, working for it, wanting to achieve something, and finally making it. It's about having carried the fire for long enough to be able to establish a steady home hearth, so to speak. Four is a steady number, four corner stones, but it doesn't mean life will be a breeze after. It just means one stage is now complete.

5 of Wands - introduces the free will, wants and needs of other people. Not everyone wants the same things; in fact, very often in life, people's needs, wants and plans clash and collide either in minor or major scale. That's what 5 Wands means. It's often interpreted as a card of competition, and competition is a conflict of competing wills. I want something, somebody else wants something, and instead of cooperation, there's competition. 5 Wands can also mean an internal struggle: my own needs, wants and plans are not aligning, but frustratingly clashing. Depending on a situation, the competition can be fun and invigorating (such as games or flirting), or annoying.

5 Wands, Shadowscapes Tarot. When outside forces make you fight for what you want - or your own conflicting wants, needs and efforts frustrate you.

6 of Wands
- what's the best case scenario following a competition? Victory! That's the message of 6 Wands. It usually shows a person riding a horse, higher above than the rest, being celebrated, acknowledged and acclaimed. Winning AND receiving public recognition are the best outcome of a competitive situation. However, sometimes it can mean egoistic tendencies, for example someone doing something just to be admired (e.g. winning hearts, being a player).

7 of Wands - things are usually never steady for long and not everybody loves the winner. There will be more competition, this time even tougher. 7 Wands shows one person standing up alone against a group. It's about taking a stand for what you believe in, care about, are passionate about. It's about trying to progress in a situation where everyone is trying to put you down. That's why the themes of 7 Wands are bravery, resilience and self-control. However, sometimes 7 Wands can mean that you're fighting a desperate battle and it's time for a break, not keep banging your head on the wall of others' resistance. There might be another, better way than open conflict or headlong push.

8 of Wands - again, what's the best case scenario after a battle? Things working out swiftly, effortlessly, with the least resistance. That's the theme of 8 Wands. It's a card about successful or rapid communication, the moment when wills, needs and wants align: it's easy to communicate when both parties want to understand and accommodate each other instead of fighting. 8 Wands can also mean news, swift change or forward momentum. It's when things flow and fly.

9 of Wands - if only everything flowed smoothly forever. 9 Wands symbolises a situation where almost all your energy is spent on working on whatever cause was triggered in the Ace, and you can't, won't, should't give up. The card often shows a wounded soldier guarding a wall of wands, 'you shall not pass': blocking enemies or naysayers or exhaustion. 9 Wands is about hidden reserves, low-burning fire that is still alive, quietly, subtly. However, it can also be about resistance, being guarded and blocked. If this card comes up, ask yourself: do I need to be resilient, or do I need to let others in, allow them to influence me, advise me, help me?

10 of Wands - all 10's in tarot are end points or culmination, things can't go further than that. It can be a happy situation: reaching the ultimate goal and happiness; or it can be a low point; there's nowhere further to go before things fall apart with serious consequences to mental and physical health. 10 Wands is the point of exhaustion. Too many wants, needs and musts have accumulated. Either you're trying to do too much at once, or other people have managed to pile up their competing needs and wants in the 5 Wands and 7 Wands situations on your load. Why are you carrying all that burden? Shed some of it asap for your own well-being.

10 Wands, Dream Logic Tarot. The load of wants, needs and tasks has become so heavy all joy has drained out of what once was a source of enjoyment, inspiration and fun.

Court cards

I think that pip cards (number cards) usually depict an action or phase in life, whereas court cards often depict a personality trait, behaviour or attitude of a person. This is not a hard and fast rule but seems to give indication. Also, court cards mean "matured energies" of the pip cards, i.e. all court cards can use, manage and survive the actions and phases depicted in cards numbered 1-10, but the level of skill depends on the "maturity" or ranking of the court card.

Cards usually picture genders but the Princess and Queen can mean a man and the Knight and King a woman - it's about the behaviour and the mindset, not about the "outward" markers of gender.

Page (or Princess) of Wands - The Page is the messenger in the court, someone who travels to bear news. The Page is also somebody in training, to become a ruler of the suit one day. Page of Wands symbolises a person (or mindset/behaviour) who's curious, passionate, powered up by the need to do, act, learn, expand; someone who likes to go beyond one's earlier boundaries and perhaps play with fire a bit. It can also mean literal or mental/emotional travel or adventure.

Knight (or Prince) of Wands - The Knight is the soldier, someone's who's brave, speedy and ready for action. Given that the suit of Wands is the suit of fire, this card is the fieriest in the deck: it's someone who doesn't think and consider, or doesn't plan his/her actions, but just jumps. It can be a good thing: jump to save the day, take the leap of faith - or it can be a bad thing: jump to conclusions, jump the gun, flee and disappear when going gets tough. To me personally this card most often means "don't be so hasty, stop and think," or "things are not as you think, you're jumping into conclusions."

Queen of Wands  - The Queens in tarot symbolise people who fully own their actions and emotions. They are poised, skilled, elegant and looked up to. The Queen of Wands is the queen of fire: passionate, fun-loving, confident, doesn't take anyone's cr@p, knows her worth, goes after what s/he believes in and wants to do. She is fully in charge of her own life and doesn't need anybody's permission. Interestingly, this card often pops up to women who are recovering from a divorce/separation: "you are your own person, fully, authentically and enjoyably - reclaim it."

Queen of Wands, Robin Wood Tarot. My favourite queen of all four suits. Someone who knows what s/he wants and how to get it. No excuses made, no permissions asked.

King of Wands - The King is the ruler of the suit, the master of every element of it and able to use his/her skills to one's own and others' advantage. The King knows his/her own worth and is able to inject confidence, courage and energy in others. A true king doesn't seek to elevate himself, but he seeks to equip his court (everybody around) with his power. This applies in particular to the King of Wands in my opinion. A true King of Wands is so comfortable in his own skin and vision that he almost by accident inspires, influences and informs others around to be more, do more, achieve more - use the tools of the suite of willpower for everyone's benefit.

Thursday, 26 January 2017

How to deal with other people's difficult issues?

As this blog suggests, I spend a lot of time thinking about happiness. It's my research topic from the angle: how does the environment affect people's happiness (or well-being, quality of life), positively and negatively? Even though I study the built and natural environment, I also think about the social environment, meaning other people.

I believe one of the major life lessons for everyone is to find the right balance between independence and interdependence. How to be our own persons, standing on our own feet, but not push others away in the process? How to ask, receive and give help without becoming clingy, interfering or irritating? How to build our own life, yet be inclusive to others? How to know where the boundaries lie?

Why is this important - or, as I think, one of the most important lessons in life? Because whether we find that balance or not, has a direct and immediate impact on happiness: our own and others.

I used to stress a lot about other people's problems. If a family member was struggling with something (a health problem, an unrewarding job, relationship issues), I'd spend days and nights trying to come up with a solution to help them become happier - or, at least, less unhappy.

Often, that was a source of mutual, accumulating frustration. I would get upset that my family member wouldn't take my advice, and I saw that as obstinate, pessimistic or lackadaisical. Whereas the person I tried to help probably saw me as interfering, overbearing or bossy. I only realised a few years ago that I can't possibly solve everyone's issues and people are, at times, unhappy. The only one who can resolve the unhappiness is the unhappy person themselves.

Not everyone is ready to do it, for myriads of reasons: not everyone sees what's the real source of their unhappiness; they don't want to face the truth; they assume/hope things will improve due to the hoped actions of other people/fortune; they don't believe (yet) that things even could change; or they're worn out by their problems and can't solve it just now.

What helped me realise I can't carry the burden of others' issues was twofold:

  • I believe everyone has their own life lessons to learn and if somebody else's lessons relate to overcoming obstacles or experiencing unhappiness, stuckness, apathy, etc. so be it; and
  • other people are not my extension and vice versa. 

What decisions my loved ones make, is not actually up to me to change. Of course, self-destructive behaviour and unhealthy decisions need to be raised and if possible, stopped. But, at the end, there's only so much outsiders can do to stop an adult from making (good or bad) decisions and living an unhappy life - other than politely offer support and conversation company.

An example. I feel that some family members are overeating, overdrinking, taking unnecessary risks or overly engaged in a conservative religious mindset (the former and the latter relatives are not the same, btw ;) ). I used to stress about those to no end. What could I do to change things? How could I help/force them to see that they are harming themselves by either creating health issues, or by creating social division and discord with their loud views?

The answer: I can't do much. I can only point it out politely and diplomatically, but I can't make anyone change. Change must come from each of us within. If these people don't see a problem in their lifestyle even after repeated discussions, then the only thing I can do is to learn live with it. Change myself, if possible, or disengage, if needed.

However, herein lies the problem: we can't force anyone to change, but I think it's our responsibility to offer a sounding board or a mirror to other people - and expect / allow others offer that to us. How could the people around us ever know we disapprove, if we don't tell it (politely and with a reasoned justification)?

I've also been guilty - and still am - for not raising issues, because I don't want to offend or cause a conflict. But withdrawal actually steals a chance from both parties to learn, grow, change for better.

Here's a spread to examine,

how to more fruitfully deal with someone else's issue?

1. What's the best way to raise the matter with the other?
2. What response can I expect, if I raise it?
3. How to best deal with the response?
4. What sort of a plan I could propose to move forward?
5. What will happen, if I don't raise it?
6. How can I offer better support?
7. How does the other person feel about his/her issue?

We are all different, yet we should be able to live peacefully side by side. Not an easy task!

Wednesday, 14 December 2016

How to be happier in the everyday?

Apologies for being MIA since October! I've been catching up with studies, work, hobbies and social life and also experiencing a bit of a writer's block with this blog. What to write about? The internet is full of clever, informative and inspirational blogs, including tarot themed, and I've felt there's not much I can add to the discussion. But then, I remembered the words of a song that translate like this:

"everything that can be done has been done, everything that can be seen has been seen,
everything that can be touched has been touched by many hands,
but not with your hands, not with your eyes,
not with your soul before you've tried it all yourself."
CMX

I like the message about: nothing's completely original, but every one of us has something new to offer, because we are all unique with our unique histories and experiences.

What is happiness?

I spend a lot of time thinking about happiness. Not just my own personal happiness, and how to stay happy, but other people's happiness and the concept of happiness in general. My PhD studies focus on the quality of life, everyday happiness and mindfulness. In particular, I'm interested in the connection of beauty and happiness: can beautiful things, surroundings and experiences make people happier? Or can the lack of beauty make people unhappy?

I'm not talking about make-up, clothes etc. (even thought they are one part of the idea, depending on what's everyone's personal preference in beauty), but noticing beauty around in the world, in the everyday.

This is a branch of philosophy called everyday aesthetics. Mindfulness, a trendy concept, draws from everyday aesthetics in my opinion. Mindfulness simply means: be aware of every moment, stay focused on the now instead of drifting to the future or past, worries, regrets or anticipations.

Being mindful can mean enjoying your cup of coffee in peace, tasting every sip. The key concept in everyday aesthetics is similar: pause, enjoy and appreciate what you have around, what your senses capture. The sun dancing on the pot plant's leaves. The aroma and scent of morning coffee. The calming, rhythmic beat of the dishwasher. The vibrant colours of the fruit in a bowl. The shine and softness of your pet's fur.

I started practising tarot and "fortunetelling", because it was an intriguing concept and I wanted to know if it even can work.

I've come to a conclusion after five years of card-reading that yes it does seem to work, and even better it works for self-development and self-reflection. Tarot is an excellent tool to examine your own deep thoughts, emotions, motives, dreams, fears... every aspect of one's personality. I've grown much calmer, mature and dare I say wiser by using tarot regularly. And funnily enough, also more mindful, to stay in the present, noticing the beauty of the everyday.

Here's my spread to realise one's blessings:

  1. What is the best thing I have in my life right now?
  2. What do I have I take for granted?
  3. What should I discard from my life?
  4. What in life inspires me?
  5. Where or how to find that inspiration?
Below: some things that make me happy - beautiful places and sights from my hoods, equally nice to enjoy with loved ones or alone. 






Thursday, 6 October 2016

How to treat the risk of failure

One of my almost-daily routines is hanging out at Aeclectic Tarot Forum, which is an online discussion board for anyone interested in tarot and wanting to practice their reading skills and intuition in general.

I have shifted from other social media to AT, because in the tarot community, the focus is on self-improvement and helping others, whereas Facebook and other platforms are nowadays flooded with bad news, disrespectful language, trolling and other negative traits this species of ours can exhibit.
The more time I spend on Facebook, the more agitated and annoyed I get, whereas with AT, the more benevolent and refreshed I feel - it's funny what a big difference the language, attitude and ambience of a forum can make.

Because AT is anonymous, people discuss their issues openly. One of the common underlying currents of discussions is "I want to do thing X, but my family/friends/social circles oppose/ridicule/don't approve it". No person is an island and whatever people around us say and think, affects us. positively or negatively. But. How can we ever achieve anything in life, if we put too much emphasis on other people's opinions?

For instance, I want to be a novelist one day. I have supportive and encouraging people around, but also those who don't think I can make it. It is possible I can't. But it's also possible I can. And the only way to find out is to give it a proper try - do my best to become what I want to be, even when it comes with the risk of failure.

People around us often think they know better, see the risks better, are more realistic than us or otherwise just have more authority to tell how to live our lives. But is that really true?

It's actually just a perception. The louder or more convincing these critics are, the more credible they sound. However, being loud or sounding confident don't make anyone right. And nobody else but you can know, whether something is good or right or doable for you.

But here's the trick. You need to believe in yourself to make it work - whether this is a new job, relationship, studies or business. Critics around can take that self-confidence away, thus spiralling you to a failure and creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. I told you so! When in fact, if they had not told you so, you wouldn't have failed. Tricky, isn't it?

My motto in life is:

nothing ventured, nothing gained. 

This (perhaps foolishly?) bold and straightforward attitude could be best described by wands tarot cards, i.e. those that depict willpower, inner fire, drive, motivation and wants. However, I think it's best captured by the slow and even dull-looking
7 Pentacles.
The traditional 7 Pentacles of Rider Waite Smith deck shows a farmer assessing his crop. Only one ripe pentacle has dropped, the rest might still fail or succeed. The only thing to do is to keep trying and hope for the best.
Tarot of the Pagan Cats shows a different side of 7 Pentacles - curiosity and play. Any dream, project or plan in life starts with curiosity (could it work? what if it worked?)  and at best, is fuelled by play: fun, exploration, creativity, excitement. Even if the dream fails after all, experiencing those elements on the way make it worth trying.
Every farmer knows that the crop might wither and die. No matter how much you've watered, tended and cared for it, it could still fail. But then again, there could be a huge reward, a bounty, a successful harvest. The only way to know is to try - not just half-heartedly, but giving it the best you've got.

I value tarot as a tool because looking at the cards and pondering them peels off layers in our thinking that are plastered in there by other people.

Looking at the pictures analytically or semi-meditatively should reveal what your real thoughts and feelings about any given matter are, free and pure from others' influence. How could I best make this project work? What are my strengths? What are my weaknesses? What could I do to strengthen the strengths and weed off the weaknesses? How to best go about with this dream of mine?

These are all empowering questions that help you forward, instead of dwelling on "I really want to do it and I think I could, but everyone says it's not wise/easy/possible/for me." Well, everyone can say that the sun will be blue tomorrow, but it doesn't make it true, does it?

Here's a spread to explore a plan or dream you're unsure about. Pull 1-3 cards for each question, depending on your preferences and reading skills.

New plan or dream - analysis spread

1. What do I believe this plan/dream will give me if it works?
2. What is the real reason I hesitate achieving it?
3. How can I overcome my hesitation?
4. What skills I have that will most help me with achieving this?
5. What in my life or thinking is hindering me from achieving this?
6. What will my life be like when I have achieved this?
7. How to best start moving towards this goal?
8. How to encourage myself to keep going until I reach my goal?

Saturday, 1 October 2016

When to change plans? Ask tarot

One of the most common questions tarot readers get is along the lines: should I keep doing what I'm doing, or change the plan and do something else?

This question repeats in every area of life: studies, work, love and relationships with loved ones in general. It is, indeed, tricky to know when to continue and when to change course. The main problem, however, is not necessarily lack of knowledge, new ideas or plans, it's this:

8 Swords.
8 Swords, Rider Waite Smith tarot.
Often in life, when we've been putting in a lot of effort on something, it feels unbearable to think that no fruit came of it. Changing a plan feels like a failure. We often don't feel at ease to quit studies, change careers, change partners or cut out friends, even when it feels there's nothing but roadblocks. The feeling of a roadblock is real, but here's the catch: the roadblock itself is not.

Tarot card 8 Swords symbolises a situation where we can't see a way forward. We're so set on one course or one thinking pattern, that we don't realise nothing else but our own worries, assumptions, expectations and beliefs are stopping us. There's always a choice - a different choice.

8 Swords of Anna K tarot shows, how the feeling of being trapped is just a projection or illusion. The person is free, holding a sword - symbolising power, knowledge and clarity of thought - but she believes she's trapped. In reality, nothing but her own thoughts are keeping her captive.
I once read that an average person makes thousands of choices every day without counting them.

We decide whether to get up or not. Whether to have breakfast or not. What to have for breakfast? What to wear for work? To go to work at all or not? Do some pilates before work or not? Catch a bus or drive? Start with task A or task B? Have a chat with Bernie or Bonnie? Leave early or stay late? Shop at Fresh Groceries or Fresh Produce? Send a few job applications at night? Sign up for couples' counselling or not?

Now, usually it feels that these are not actual choices. Many are self-evident, automated motions we have to carry out to simply live life. But, from a philosophical point of view, they are all choices. And if we chose differently, our day and life would be different.

8 Swords is the mindset where things happen and thoughts are thought, because that's how it's always done. But technically, we could NOT go to work. NOT talk to Bonnie the Boss, but Bernie the Jovial Friend. NOT go shopping at all but drive to Vegas to spend all our money, never come back and forget our job and marriage troubles forever.

Maybe not the best decisions, but decisions and choices nevertheless. And if any of the daily choices are different than usually, the day is different and can gradually produce a different life, when changes and different choices accumulate.

To wind back to bigger life choices. How to know when a change of plans is in order, and how to encourage oneself to take that step?

It can feel daunting to admit that nothing came of this field of studies, career, or relationship. What will everyone else say? How will I be viewed? How can I justify to myself or others I've spent so much time on this, and now I've got no results to show?

This, again is the 8 Swords: feeling trapped due to thoughts. Thoughts are only mental constructions and ways to see the situation, and they can be changed: negative, limiting thoughts produce trapped behaviour; whereas positive, expansive, curious thoughts produce new choices, new plans, new vistas.

I used to do a lot of knitting and that was a hobby that thought me the necessity of sometimes going back and fixing things from the root. If I made a mistake with the pattern, it could not be patched up later on. My creation would very visibly show, almost radiate the fact there was an error. I often had to undo what I had knit, unravel perhaps an hour's work. What a pain. And yet, it simply had to be done to get the best result. If I'm putting a lot of effort into something, why accept grade C quality?

Life is a lot like knitting. We try to create something the best we can, sometimes we follow a pattern, sometimes we wing it, but in every case, if there is a mistake made or wrong turn taken, we might need to humbly go back and do it again - change course, no matter how late it feels.

Nobody excels at living and nobody's life is error free. So let yourself out of the mental jail and stop judging your earlier choices; more importantly, stop listening to anybody who judges your choices.

If something needs to be changed or fixed, don't be afraid of unravelling. What you build next can be much better. At least it's different, and a source for different lessons.

Here's a spread that can help (pull 1-3 cards for each question depending on your preferences and skills).

When and how to change plans?

What in my life needs to change?

To what direction should the change be?

What action to take to change it?

What have I learned from going through this path until the change?

What in my life needs to stop altogether?

How to stop it?

What in my life needs to start?

How to start it?

Tarot cards 8 Wands and 8 Cups symbolise taking action (or communication); and realising that something does not bring joy any more or won't become fulfilling, no matter how much we try. So, it's better to move on and take action to change plans.

Sunday, 25 September 2016

Tarot as a moral compass

Studying tarot has been a major eye-opener or rather, a mind-expander, for myself in the areas of a world view, values and thinking patterns. Since I started reading tarot, I've become more mature, calm and zen in life in general. How and why did that happen?

When I first stumbled on tarot some five years ago, I was mostly curious about its symbolism - I have a degree in art history and I've been drawn to understanding and deciphering symbols and codes since the start of my studies, in the best Dan Brown / Da Vinci Code manner.

Quite soon, I became enticed by tarot's divination skills: how could such a thing possibly exist and were the divinatory "powers" tarot clearly seemed to have (based on my Excel spreadsheets I kept to track my predictions) merely an illusion or a real thing? And if they were a real thing, how could that possibly be true from any scientific point of view I knew?

After encountering tarot, I became less enthusiastic about the reductionist, scientific and rather simplistic world view (matter is all there is) and other, more layered, metaphysical explanations started to make more sense.

I became more and more interested in the Eastern spiritualism (inc. Buddhism, Taoism etc.) and later on, on the traditions of Western Mysticims, including New Age but also other streams such as the Golden Dawn (one of the occult societies that created their own version of tarot cards in the turn of the 19th and 20th centuries), Theosophy, Druidism, Wiccan etc.

I don't subscribe to any religion or specific spirituality, but perhaps Theosophy hits closest to home with the idea that everyone should study and learn from every possible philosophy, religion and spiritual tradition, to form their own views and be as informed as possible = to be the lovers of wisdom, theo sophists.

I have not concluded how it could be possible that tarot can have any divinatory powers. The cards definitely seem to have them, for sure. I have predicted, for instance, meeting my husband, certain events happening at work, a couple of major arguments coming up with close relatives, and so on. I'll discuss my theory later on. Today, I'm more interested in discussing the "we see what we focus on"-theory.

I think that at its most rudimentary level, tarot is just a trigger for intuition in the same way than clouds, flames, foliage, or even wallpaper patterns can be. The human mind is incredibly apt in finding patters, forms and images - making meaning - where there is none. I believe we see patterns and images in the clouds, tree canopies, in the fur of our pets and practically, wherever, because we project what's in our mind anyway.

Tarot is all about looking at pictures and understanding their symbolic meanings. Normally, cards are rich in imagery and there is always something different to focus on. For one person, a white lily in the picture jumps out, because s/he is contemplating a matter that relates to innocence, children, purity of thought etc. For another reader, a medieval sword in the picture draws attention because his/her mind is occupied with thoughts about arguments, need for clarity, painful/hurtful words = blades etc.

People in general see meaning where it is only hinted - to the point where it becomes a problem. Think of all the times you - or perhaps your significant other - read something between the lines and it was, in fact, completely off base, only brought into existence by your own fears or hopes?

With tarot, the trick is to see meaning, but not too much of it. Intuition can't be paranoia or wishful thinking. How to find the exact amount of gut feeling? With practice. We know much more about life, ourselves and other people than we realise, but that requires careful tuning into the quietest wave lengths of our mind: it's about hearing the whispers, the hunches, the tiniest signs we've captured earlier without realising it.

As mentioned at the beginning, tarot has had a very educational role in my own life. When I focus on the tarot cards, I see messages of wisdom, patience and good will. Cards that repeat in my readings, highlight issues and recommend ways to fix things. For example, I have made a deliberate effort to become less fiery/trigger happy and more understanding and emphatic in arguments, because of the repeating message I've picked from the cards. Of course, the repeating cards can be a mere coincidence. And still, after I've understood and incorporated the message, the repetition stops.

Seeing messages in tarot or in any other medium can be explained by the fact that the human mind is tuned to see  meaning everywhere. I've seen meaning in random cards and it is not necessarily anything mystical. On the other hand, if seeing meaning improves the quality of life, is that a bad thing or wrong? Of course not.

Why and how has tarot made me calmer and more mature? I think it's partly because of self-reflection the cards give prompts for; and partly because of the divinatory properties.

Whether or not I can prove that the predictions are true, I feel that I can know what's coming up and there is a reason why certain events happen. That makes me much calmer towards any upheaval or sudden change in the future.

With advance notice, there's less reason for stress. And with the world view that everything happens for a reason and contains a lesson to draw from, hardly anything is scary. It just is. We always have a chance to decide, how to feel about matters, how to react, what action to take, how to fix or change or adapt into the situation.

I think that tarot in itself can be a way of life. Reading cards is often accompanied by some spiritual world view, but not always. Perhaps the only thing that connects all the readers is the idea that random pictures can trigger the intuition to know more than it otherwise could. Tarot is, at its core, about expanded knowledge, wisdom, and understanding of oneself and others.

Tarot to me is an inherently empathetic messaging channel; to me the cards always show the high road, the better way, the more moral take on the issue. Perhaps it's nothing more than a reflection of my own subconscious, but luckily my subconscious seems very concerned about the well-being of others AND myself, and hence, has helped me to become a better person. Thanks tarot! :)

Can the cards really know what's going on or what should be done? Actually, it doesn't matter. It's the reader who makes sense of the pictures and finds meaning in patterns with his/her intuition. 

Monday, 22 August 2016

Are you a grounded person and why it matters?

The purpose of this blog is to discuss topics that people often ask from the cards/card readers, and offer insight on what I have learned about difficult matters such as reconciliation, getting along with someone who's challenging, or making decisions when things don't seem to move on.

I thought this time I could talk about something that I have been struggling with to learn.

Grounding oneself.

This is the topic every mindfulness teacher, meditation guru or yoga enthusiast seems to be preaching, but what does it actually mean?

Feeling grounded can mean feeling in balance, or feeling steady, or feeling in control of one's life. But does it mean you won't budge or be flexible? How to tell the difference between being grounded and balanced, and being fixated, stubborn or defensive? And furthermore: how to achieve this magical grounded state? What's the purpose of it or what are the benefits of it?

I am a curious and interested person in general and read a lot, about any topic under the sun: politics, news, environment, arts and culture, social issues, lifestyle, tarot, mindfulness, life change, and so on. Consequently, I have quite a big of a memory bank of assorted facts and bits of info. I also love interacting in the social media, but unfortunately I have had to admit to myself that I'm not very skilled at it. In terms of staying balanced, grounded and helpful.

I was not making a positive difference.

Probably we all know how chats or debates on Facebook and elsewhere online can turn sour or heated with a couple of insensitive comments and I have not done my bit to keep it civil. I'm not one to call names, because I believe when your resort to yelling at someone (either vocally or by texting) "you're an idiot", you've lost it: the other person won't listen nor respect you and that's the end of any fruitful interaction.

However, I used to pride myself for stingy little witty remarks that shut up the other person. I thought I won the argument. But did I?

Of course not.

What happens in situations like that is that the other leaves the conversation and continues to believe what they believe, perhaps even double convinced that it's their job to expose the big conspiracy about the world government faking the climate change - whereas I'm in the camp green and hoping to change our lifestyle to more sustainable before it's too late.

With a lot of contemplation, both on purpose and subconsciously, and also with a business mentor, I've finally reached a state when I understand where my need to win stemmed.

From fear.

Subconsciously, I've been thinking that if I give room to opinions that drastically differ from mine, I'm allowing my beliefs and convictions to be slowly nibbled away and they will disappear or be "overruled" by someone else.

And this is where groundedness or "being centred" comes at play. 

Being grounded simply means I understand what are my core values and where my emotional or intellectual roots are. A person who is grounded is able to be flexible and curious, like a resilient coastal tree in the wind, but it won't snap, nor it will be ripped away by the storm. After encountering a bit of a gush or a full-on storm, the tree simply wavers back to its spot and continues life.

A grounded person does not have a need to try to overrule others, or aggressively oppose their views. The person knows s/he is who s/he is, no matter what others think. And a grounded person is able to be open to others' views, curiously and maturely, to learn and evolve within and around one's core.

Of course, there are opinions in this world that are nothing but hurtful; racism, sexism, or any sort of discrimination or bullying. But a grounded person is able to stand up against those with calm wisdom and properly thought-through arguments; and also with understanding that these views usually rise from fear or misunderstandings. The calmer and more respectful the discussion, the better the outcome, usually.

Here's a little tarot spread to examine this topic - what  are your core values and how to be more grounded?

1. What is my core value?
2. Why does it matter so much to me?
3. What action can I take to feel more grounded?
4. What aspect in my thinking I should change to respect others' core values?
5. How to live a more balanced, satisfying life in general?

And a sample spread: 

1. THE EMPRESS. This is the card of the feminine principle/archetype: nurture and care, creation, nature, Gaia. For me personally it means appreciating nature and creativity in all its forms, because it is our divine purpose to live on this planet as its guardians and explore and express our creativity. This card absolutely nails my core value, well done tarot!

2. 7 PENTACLES. This card is about putting in effort to make something tangible happen: waiting for results. For me it says: my core value is important, because it's a way to make a difference, to make something new, to cultivate this living environment of ours towards better for all.

3. 10 CUPS. This is the card of happy community: a loving family, peaceful society, happiness and bliss shared with others. I should draw from my community and contribute to its harmony and joy with my own actions.

4. 2 PENTACLES. This card talks about balancing two equally important matters. Clearly I should remember that what is different, is not necessarily of lesser value. Other people's views can be equally important and there's no need for either party to give up on their beliefs - they can coexist.

5. THE CHARIOT. This card is about will-power, determination, driving towards a goal, wanting to achieve things. This is a bit tricky card for myself because it usually pops up to denote situations where someone is applying too much willpower; is steamrolling others. Maybe it's a reminder for me *not to do that*, but also remember to strive towards my goal to actively improve this world.

This world is full of different people with different "home beliefs"and the best course of action is simply to try to get along. Photo (c) Tarot for Change.